I know people who like to clean. I don’t understand it, but they probably don’t understand why I like being a Kindergarten teacher and hanging out all day with large groups of five-year-olds.
Cleaning overwhelms me because my brain does not organize tasks in a linear fashion, and I end up with a far bigger job than the one with which I began. I call it Spiral Thinking, because it sounds pretty and a lot nicer than Splatter Thinking, which is closer to reality.
For example, I will decide the computer desk needs dusting, so I go downstairs to get dust rag and discover the shelf where I keep the rags is in disarray. So I start to take off the items on the shelf and find that I can’t wipe down that shelf because the rags aren’t there. I open a drawer where rags can be found when my husband puts them away, and lo and behold, it’s a wreck (and there are no rags).
I could go on, unfortunately, but for the sake of all that is good in this life, I will leave the rest to your imagination. I think you can agree that the spiral analogy holds, especially if you visualize it moving in a downward direction.
Being a non-linear thinker is amazing for almost anything that doesn’t involve organizing in any way. So it’s actually amazing for almost nothing except doing fun, impulsive things like going to the beach to avoid putting away all the clean laundry that is sitting in baskets in our bedrooms.
And these days, shouldn’t we all be at the beach? I woke to a crisp, clear sunrise this morning.
Now it’s a gorgeously warm day where all you want to do is sit in the sun, drink cool beverages, and eat guacamole and chips.
Besides, what’s the big deal? The clean laundry isn’t going anywhere. In fact, at least half of it will remain in the basket all week as I pull out items to wear each day. I could definitely work with this system until at least late June when the sun takes over the entire sky and determines to bake the brains inside the delicate cages of our heads.
In other words, WE HAVE NO CHOICE.
Consider the following:
1) Dust is a natural occurrence. It’s probably organic, which is supposed to be in style anyway.
2) I have heard from a reliable source (my brother) that dishes should be air-dried for optimal health. I usually take what my brother says with a kilo of salt, but in this case I think he’s onto something.
3) My cleaning lady will eventually come back (fingers crossed) and I don’t want her to stand around with nothing to do. In case you’re asking, I am almost certain she didn’t leave because of my Spiral Thinking approach to house organization. Like, 67% sure.
4) My kids have grown into adulthood with the knowledge that their mother sacrificed impeccable organization so that I could take them to fun places and tell them to amuse themselves while I closed my eyes in a sun chair. Imagine growing up understanding what your mom gave up so she could do this for you. The mind cannot comprehend.
Spiral Thinkers of Vallarta: We have a duty to pass on this message to our loved ones. If you get out there and ignore the teetering piles of dishes and laundry in your houses, the Linear Ones will surely follow. ‘Cause we’re fun. And we have all the snacks. See you at Los Muertos Pier.
